


I Love Him

by monkeyihihji



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: I didn't expect so much angst, M/M, On my own is Crowley's jam after this, Pining Crowley, Pining Idiots, ineffable husbands, pining aziraphale, upset crowley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-03 19:47:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19470913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monkeyihihji/pseuds/monkeyihihji
Summary: Aziraphale begs Crowley to see a new musical based off a book of an old friend. Crowley thought surely a musical over a revolution would be boring, yet he agreed anyway. He certainly din't expect to relate so heavily to a character.





	I Love Him

The scene played out like this: two characters found themselves in a dusty bookshop located in Soho. The two characters mentioned prior are: Aziraphale--who is a not-so-good angel and the bookshop owner--and Crowley, who is a not-so-bad demon and doesn’t care so much for the books, but more so the owner. The conversation to this point was Crowley agreeing to accompany Aziraphale to a night out to a musical show. 

“Oh, my dear boy, do dress a bit more… refined.” Aziraphale begged Crowley after the demon had agreed upon going.

“And what’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” Crowley asked the angel, a smirk plastered to his face as he gestured to his tight black outfit. 

Aziraphale looked a bit flustered at the question as his eyes wandered down and then up, “it’s a tad bit… well, the problem is--it’s just not proper attire! Victor was a good friend of mine, you know, and I don’t want to disrespect him in someway.” 

“What’s he gonna do, angel, haunt you?” 

“Well, there’s the possib--”

Crowley shook his head and held up his hands in mock defeat, interrupting the angel, “Fine. Fine. I’ll do it. But you owe me.”

The smile the angel gave was so bright that Crowley was thankful his eyes were hiding behind his sunglasses. 

The situation was this: the demon, Crowley, was helplessly in love with Aziraphale. So much so to the point where he nearly burned his feet completely off in order to save his angel. In fact, Crowley was whipped the moment Aziraphale said he gave his flaming sword away in the very beginning. It had been nearly six thousand years, and the angel kept finding new ways to make the demon fall more in love with him. However, there was a problem: Aziraphale didn’t feel the same way. Crowley was almost certain of this. 

But demons can be wrong, and it so happened to be that this demon was in fact, extremely wrong. While Aziraphale hadn’t been in love for as long as Crowley had been, there was no denying the fact the angel was completely head-over-heels in love with the vaguely sauntering man. He had been since World War II, when Crowley performed such a sweet miracle of saving some of his books. Yet, he was almost certain the demon wasn’t in love with him.

Despite Crowley completely misunderstanding the angel’s feelings, it did not stop him from showing up at London's Barbican Theatre in the nicest clothing he deemed “proper attire”. He was wearing a tie for Hell’s sake! He hoped the tie alone would be enough to distract from his snake skin shoes.

“Thank you, my dear.” Aziraphale whispered, slightly against Crowley as they took their seats. 

He screwed his nose up at the phrase and growled, “You know I don’t like that.”

“It means a lot to me that you wore a suit.” Aziraphale corrected himself.

The demon was suddenly thankful for the dim lights as he felt the tips of his ears heat up, “Well, don’t get used to it. The man who owned it will probably be missing it in a few hours.” Of course he lied. He couldn’t let Aziraphale know that he went out to find a proper suit just to impress him.

Aziraphale was also thankful for the dimmed lights, for thankfully Crowley wasn’t able to see how much he was enjoying the suit he was wearing. The thankfulness the angel felt soon turned to annoyance as the show began. He should have known better than to take Crowley to a musical. The demon seemed to have no ability to keep his mouth shut. His whispers kept ringing through Aziraphale’s ear:

“He stole bread?” 

“Hush.”

-

“Oh. Now he’s stealing other things. Good for him.” 

“Shush.” 

-

“She looks far better with shorter hair.”

“Quiet.”

-

“He seems like great parents to party with.”

“Crowley.”

-

“Oh. Saving a child! He’s turned good.”

“ _Crowley!”_

-

“They barely met, they aren’t in love.”

“I swear, I’ll move if you do not stop.”

Surprisingly so, Crowley did, but not because he was requested to do so. The demon’s mouth was open as if he was preparing a snarky comment, but his eyes were glued to the woman on the stage. He had never heard such a song before; with such longing and he felt something heavy in his chest. 

_And I know_

_It's only in my mind,_

_That I'm talking to myself_

_And not to him._

_And although I know that he is blind,_

_Still I say,_

_There's a way for us._

He risked a side glance at his angel. His Aziraphale. As blind as the man the woman was singing about. And despite that, here Crowley was. Still with him. Still beside him even though he knows Aziraphale would never feel the same. He loves him. He’s loved him for years upon years with “what-ifs” and “if onlys” to get him by. And yet, he’s certain that the angel would be perfectly fine without him. Probably more relaxed, the poor anxious thing. He knew he went to fast for the smaller man. Yet, Crowley wouldn’t be a demon if he wasn’t selfish; if he didn’t want to keep Aziraphale as close as he possibly can. After that, Crowley stayed quiet, far too engrossed in the story of Eponine and Marius to care about any other story going on in the musical. 

Even Aziraphale noticed a change in his companion. He felt slightly smug in thinking that Crowley was enjoying himself. He noticed how the tall man seemed to lean forward in his seat in certain scenes compared to others. He also noticed how the demon seemed to slump at a certain scene during the barricade where Marius held the dying pining girl. He thought at one point he saw a shimmer run down the other’s face, but he thought it best not to say anything. 

The odd silence followed Crowley after the bows and the standing ovation. He walked beside Aziraphale as the angel talked excitedly about how much he enjoyed the musical. “And the ending! Beautiful parallelism, don’t you think. With the father and the mother. Oh! I just loved Cosette and Marius. Perfect for each other, don’t you think?”

This statement broke Crowley out of his stupor and he looked down at Aziraphale, “No. I don’t _think_.” 

Aziraphale stopped walking for a moment, watching as the taller man kept going, “You don’t think Marius and Cosette should have ended up together?”

Crowley sighed, “Forget I said anything. Come on, angel. He flicked his wrist in a beckoning manner.

Aziraphale recognized the dismissive tone, but something made him push further, “Do you think he should have been with Eponine?”

The demon stopped walking, “She’s obviously the better choice. They had history and whatnot.”

“He was rather blind to her, wasn’t he? She was so in love with him,” Azirapgale glanced down, “but so was Cosette.”

“Was it love or lust?” Being a demon, Crowley knew all about lust. “Not a lust for a partner, but for a different lifestyle. That’s all Cosette wanted Marius for. Eponine was the one who loved him, even for his faults. She followed him to her death, and even then she wanted to be with him. She gave everything for a man who barely glanced in her direction.”

With more thought and consideration over the matter, Crowley almost viewed Cosette with the same disdain he held for Gabriel. It would only make sense for Aziraphale to end up loving the other angel more than him. After all, they were both of the same side and it would be easier to get God’s approval.

Aziraphale was a little shocked to hear his friend talk of love with such tenderness. He didn’t know the demon could feel such a way and his betrayed him by doing a flip. “I suppose you’re right, my dear. I never knew you to feel so strongly about love before.”

This is what Crowley wanted to do: What he wanted to do was shove Aziraphale against the nearest wall and have their faces so close they were touching. What he wanted to do was stare down into his angel’s blue eyes and for once not be embarrassed at the heated eye contact. What he wanted was to say, “I only feel so strongly about you.” And then collide their lips together in such passion that the angel would forget for a moment about being on opposite sides. 

This is what Aziraphale wanted to do: What he wanted to do was pull Crowley near him. What he wanted to do was pull the other man’s tie down so that they were face to face. What he wanted to do was kiss the demon so soft and fondly that Crowley would forget all his troubling thoughts. 

What Crowley actually did was this: “Don’t expect it ever again.” He huffed as he began sauntering his way to his car again. 

What Aziraphale actually did was this: He dropped the conversation entirely, “I’m a little peckish, think maybe we could go somewhere?” He asked as his shorter legs hurried to keep up.

The scene played out like this: two characters walked to the car. One character--Aziraphale the Angel--rambled on about what food he was craving. The other character--Crowley the Demon--listened and added small sounds to make sure the angel knew he was paying attention. The situation the two faced was that both were completely in love with the other. The problem was that both were too blind to realize they both felt the same way.

**Author's Note:**

> Oof. I'm back at it again! I saw a tumblr post and it wouldn't leave my mind. Here's the post: https://sonhoedesrazao.tumblr.com/post/185507842938/the-year-is-1985-aziraphale-makes-crowley


End file.
